A Very Long Update

So I recently moved back into my apartment…and have been a bit stressful. First we had no power, and when I left on Friday we had no internet access. Great right? Somehow I’ve managed to stay as optimistic as I possibly can. I mean, because the library isn’t too far. I can just print off my homework and such there.

It’s nice that I was able to come home this weekend and visit with my family. Although this visit wasn’t exactly planned. My parents didn’t expect to see me until October, however there was a bunch of stuff that needed to be dealt with at home. So a nice long three hour bus ride and I’m back to my tiny bed, in my tiny room, with my piano, guitar and row of tiny pointless soccer trophies.

Despite the situation at my apartment my classes have been going well so far. I mean, I’ve only been going at it for a week. I’m pretty bummed out that one of my friends were unable to come to school this year, but I only have to government to blame for that. I live in one of the most “educated” countries in the world and yet the majority of the people are in so much debt after they finish university that they spend the rest of their lives trying not to drown in debt.

I’m almost done my undergraduate. Its pretty weird to think about. Like, here I am on this teeny tiny budget, almost finished my degree, single and seriously not looking forward to returning to my previous summer job. I can survive on my tiny budget for a while. I don’t eat much, nor do I spend a lot of money. I also have a gift card so I’m able to purchase a lot of my books using that. Actually…my sister and I have been getting by lately solely on our collection of gift cards. So thank you to all those lovely folks who gave us gift cards for Christmas and such. You’re all fantastic!

Seriously though, gift cards for the movies, for books, for clothes, for restaurants. With all these gift cards I can entertain, clothe and feed myself for around $25 and I don’t have to spend any of my hard earned money. All I have to worry about is paying rent.

I suppose a writing update is in order. I’ve currently put my book on hold until next month, just because I don’t want to try to publish it while I’m getting settled back into my school routine. But yah, getting ready for publishing. That’s exciting. My parents have been waiting since…April ha, ha. My other books are all going very well. If I feel stuck on one book I work on another. Doesn’t matter if I’m researching, planning, illustrating. I just have to be doing something art related. I’m not sure how many copies of my first book I’m going to publish or what sort of route I want to take. I’ve looked at all sorts of things with my Dad, and I’m doing my best to figure out the best plan for myself.

So once it is published, then I’ll probably make a really hyper-excited post about it. However right now I feel super drained…so I probably sound kind of blah. I went to bed earlier than usual, but I think I burnt myself out earlier in the week and now it’s catching up to me. I guess I could technically try to lay back down or a bit, but my parents said we were hitting the road early morning. I always assume that early morning is around seven or eight? Apparently its like eleven to everyone else in my family.

Alrighty then. Well, I’ve wanted to post something for weeks now and I finally was able to…since I have power and access to the web. I would’ve blogged at the library but I get a little shy writing around other people…or drawing. I can doodle and write poetry on my stuff no problem but that’s when I’m confident no one is paying any attention to me. If I’m one of those people who doesn’t like being hovered over while I work. Been that way since I was a little kid. I like my space.

Okie, dokie. I will let you all know how the publishing process goes once I begin that. Should be exciting. In the meantime, I’ve got to double check that I put all my homework back into my backpack.

Till next time,

— R.

 

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Letters to Myself

I just started watching a new show called Orange. It’s under the 2016 Summer Anime list, if anyone is wonder. It got me thinking about this project I did back when I was 16, where we had to write a letter addressed to our past selves. I can remember giving my 13 year old self a huge lecture on how I should have been more out going and less occupied with what others thought about me. At 16, I thought that I knew everything. My parents still say that I think I know everything, and that I enjoy correcting people (mostly my mother). My mom thinks I’m egotistical due to the fact that I’m a musician. I couldn’t deny it because there are days when I spend hours just looking at myself…and I do take a lot of selfies (I don’t share them anywhere).

To be honest I think what happened was, after being a moody 13 year old with a low self-esteem, I went to high school and decided I no longer cared if I wasn’t with the in-crowd. As you can see, I’m no longer ashamed to admit that I watch anime. One of my closest childhood friends from when I was 3 or 4 was from Japan, and so they used to buy me animes on VHS. No I don’t call myself an otaku. Yes I also read manga, but I enjoy comics in general (Archie anyone? Gotta love Jughead). So basically, to get back on topic, I realized that just because my hobbies have always consisted of writing, watching anime and music didn’t mean that I had to hide it from people. I figured, if people liked me for who I was then that was great. It was stupid trying to lie about what shows I watched and what sports I liked when I wasn’t really into any of that. While all my friends played football (American), I was more interested in pretending I was a Jedi knight…or petting the stray cat that liked to visit us at recess.

So I suppose my 16 year old self had a reason to be so harsh towards my 13 year old self. The thing is, looking back now, being 13 and 16 was equally stressful and I went through experiences that…well at the time made me feel like the sky was falling. Now that I’m considered an adult (who drinks mountain dew instead of beer and uses a starwars cup while using the worlds best Spiderman bookmark), I think I can say that I’ve realized that each part of my life is a new challenge. It seems hard at the time but once I get over it, it feels like it was a breeze.

From my first time being extremely jealous to my first date. My first experience with death to my first time holding a new baby. From bad grades to bulking down. From writing an entire novel without chapters or page numbers to becoming more organized and actually planning things out. The big and the small, all molded me into the somewhat adult I am today…although all the 16 year olds I work with think I’m the same age.

So, I’m not sure what I would say to myself at ages 13 or 16…or even to myself ten years from now when I’m 30. Wow…I’ll be 30 some day. Hopefully I have my life in order by then. To be honest I feel like I got myself where I need to be now. I try not to lie awake at night regretting the decisions I’ve made in the past. I try not to ponder the future too much either these days. Kind of makes me feel a little down…knowing that certain people won’t be with me anymore. All I can do is keep going forward. If YOLO taught me anything in high school it was that I should spend more time laughing and less time fighting. I should make time for friends and family. I should go into a career that I know I will love and will give me the most fulfilment. I shouldn’t jump the gun on decisions, and I shouldn’t put them off too long either. I shouldn’t think too much, and I should know when to take the time to think. I should step outside of my comfort zone, and I shouldn’t be afraid to stand my ground. If this were a letter to my past self or the person I’ll be when I’m 30…I’d probably say “You’re doing great. Just remember right now is a challenge but once you get over this hill, you’ll find the next will be a little easier to climb.”

— R

Novel Update

On Saturday I got a lot of writing done and I was finally able to complete the chapter I’d been stuck on. I can’t even remember what had stumped me in the first place but I managed to continue where I had left off. Not once did I believe I had writers block and it’s my professor’s advice that helped with that.

My creative writing professor said that writers block does not actually exist until you begin believing in it. She explained that once you say something it comes to being. She told us that if we become stuck or we are struggling in a certain area of our work that we should simply work on something else. She explained that this was better than not writing at all because as long as someone is writing they are unable to say that they’ve got writers block.

Although I’m not fully sure about the mid-section, where I continued that chapter I am 100% satisfied with the way it ended. It allowed me to move certain characters into position for the climax as well as set up important events.

I thought sharing my professor’s words on writers block would be great because while I was stuck on that chapter, I’d been working on other projects, such as my class portfolio and not once did the idea of writers block pop into my head: I was always writing.

I will update again soon. I hope you’re having a wonderful weekend!

— R.

Writing Update!

It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything, so I’d like to begin this post by apologizing for that. I was really hammered with assignments for school. I’m on break now so thankfully I’m able to focus on my personal projects again.

I’ve got a short story that I’d love to share with all of you. It’s the first one that I’ve written other than a children’s book that I find decent, however it’s currently being marked so I can’t share it until I’ve received it back. I don’t want my professor to think I took it from someone named Orion, even though we’re the same person.

I was extremely shocked by the way my story turned out. Some of my YA fiction contains scenes with violence but my short story had an intense amount of it. I’ve never written a story like this before. It’s slightly creepy and slightly exciting all at the same time. If I look at it one way, it means that I’ve grown as a writer…look at it the other way and it means that I might have some deep dark aggression buried within me. Either way…shocked by the result.

I’m also hoping that I’ll be able to get lots of work in on my series that I’d like to post online throughout the week. I’d like to include pictures with the story, and if I’m lucky I’ll have it up by the end of the month. It needs a lot of work though, so I don’t want to make any promises. I’d really like to finish the first section of the story before I go back to school though. Once it gets closer to exams I’m going to have to manage my time better.

It’s getting late and I’d like to get a bit of work in before I fall asleep. I’ll blog again real soon!

Stay golden!

— R.

Friday Mornings with Ryder. “You Wanna Date?” ft. Orion.

“Alright. Puff up that chest. Keep that head up. Good, now make sure you’ve got your shirt on frontwards…we don’t want another one of those incidents. Good. Good.”

I blankly stared at myself in the mirror. “I didn’t sleep last night.”

“Forget sleep! Who needs sleep! This isn’t about you sleeping this is about you being confident and awesome and going out there and saying, ‘Why hello there’.”

I groaned. “Dude…can’t I just like not?”

“You wanna date?”

“Yes.”

“Then don’t be such a little–.”

“OH KAY! Sheesh…no need to be so hard on me. I’m still figuring this stuff out okay?”

“Well figure this stuff out faster Ryder! You’ve only got so much time!”

I dragged my feet back to bed. “Wake me up when the sun’s actually in the sky.”

“The sun waits for no man!”

“Yah…that’s why I’m waiting for the sun.” I sighed. Then I sighed again and rolled onto my back. Then I rolled onto my stomach again and propped my chin up. “I can’t sleep.”

“Love will do that to you.”

“I’m not in love. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I snapped.

They chuckled. “Then why were you so excited for Friday?”

“Because. I have lots of exciting things to do on Friday.”

“Like what, you don’t even go out for drinks in the evening like normal people. What is wrong with you? Who sits at home and watches cartoons until bed?”

“We do that Orion. We do that.”

“Yah well…I want to do something different this weekend! Let’s get ourselves a date!”

I rolled onto my back again. “I dunno bruh.”

“It’ll be FUN!”

“It’ll be fun…it’ll be fun. Go by yourself.”

“Why are you in denial? Stop denying your true feelings!” cried Orion.

I sighed. “Because I’m not going to let myself get caught up in my emotions and have my heart torn out again. Remember last time?”

“Last time was different. This time it’s for real!” Orion shouted, shaking me. “Doesn’t it feel different?”

“Remember how I felt like throwing up yesterday?”

“Yes?”

“Stop shaking me…my stomach feels gross.”

“Oh great! Getting all gross on the weekend! How could you! You planned this! You planned this Ryder! I’ll never forgive you!”

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

“Hey Ryder, your alarms going off.”

“Hooray…” I moaned, pulling myself out of bed. “I’m going to blog now.”

“But…but YOU NEED TO PLAN FOR YOUR DATE!”

“I don’t have a date! Do you see me dating anyone!? NO! I’m going to blog like a respectable person and then I’m going to get dressed and blah, blah, blah, blah!”

Orion frowned. “Fine. Be that way…jerk.”


Enjoy your Friday folks.

I’ll be getting ready for class now…since I’ve got nothing better to do. I love my life.

Peace!

–R.

I think I miss my family now…

Ugh…I never should’ve watched these clips from kids movies.

Oh well. Gonna see everyone for my mom’s 50th. I’d better get some sleep. I’ll finish my random video watching…colouring…thing later.

I was colouring some pictures I drew of character’s I forgot I made. I didn’t realize that I’d started a really good novel a few years back. I’m shocked at how well it was written. It’s a huge step up from my first few novels. I wish my sister didn’t talk me out of writing that one. She said the introduction was too dark.

She doesn’t like it whenever people die in my stories and I describe their like…deadness.

I should seriously share more drawing on here. I should also sleep now because…I don’t want my professor calling me out because I’m asleep in his class. I was late for the first one because I went to the wrong class and then I lost my keys and…it was a really bad day. So this week I’m going to show up on time and I’ll be all smart and actually try to contribute. I guess being in a class with upper years is a little intimidating at times. Wow…I’m really tired.

Who wants to clean the pencil crayons off my bed for me? I’ll give you peach flavoured juice….and a twizzler.

Alright…I’ll stop being lazy.

— R.

First Big Writing Assignment of the School Year…Yikes!

So this week my class is starting our first big writing assignment, which is our short story assignment.

Now I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before on my blog but short stories aren’t my strong point when there is a limit as to the number of pages I can have or the word count. I’m stronger when it comes to novels and writing lyrics. Actually many of my novels have songs written into them so that when they’re adapted into films there will be an awesome soundtrack. I’m being serious. I actually have soundtracks for my novels of songs that I’ve written about characters, chapters and if my character is a musician then I actually record the songs that my characters perform in the text. I go all out. It is not just a book. It is…like…a living breathing thing. I guess that sounds over the top.

My sister thinks it’s kind of cool but she also gets annoyed when I record these songs while she’s trying to sleep. I’ve had things thrown at me and no, I’m not a bad musician. I don’t suck! My sister just has to hear me all the time. We actually write a lot of music together and perform it. I’m teaching her to sing because our voices automatically complement each other. She’s the one person that I enjoy harmonizing with because the sound it makes… I can’t even put it into words. Whenever we sing together and harmonize perfectly off the bat we both react like this

Me: WHOA!

Lil Sis: That was…AWESOME!

Me: REPLAY THAT! REPLAY!

And then we have to stop the recording because we usually interrupt our flow due to the fact that it sounded good. It also has to do with the fact that my sister thinks she’s a horrible singer.

ANYWAY back to talking about the short story thing. So the first big assignment is a short story assignment. It’s a story on whatever I want it to be which is great because I get to be creative with it. However, as I just said short stories aren’t really my go to thing.

I do like to write children’s books but those to me are sort of…well they’re for my nieces age group. That’s who I’m writing for. I write those for her. She’s in kindergarten (age’s 4-6 in Canada).

To me, short stories and children’s literature are in two different sections. Perhaps that’s simply because I separated them in my own head but because children’s books tend to have pictures, are not too lengthy and are geared toward a specific audience I place them under their own category outside of the short story category. Does that make sense? I hope so….

I’m not sure of how I want to approach this assignment. I have readily made written material for novels, however I don’t want to have to convert that material into short story material. It’s almost like…I have to plan out the format based off of the idea and if I’ve already decided on a format that I would like to present my idea in then it’s difficult to change it. I mean… that’s why we have different forms of writing. Not all films should be adapted into novels and not all novels should be adapted into screen plays. They were written a certain way for a reason. Now most books make great films, but of course for those of us who read the book before seeing the film it can be pretty difficult to separate them.

I had an interesting discussion with an upperclassman about it the other week actually. I’ll share that another time though.

Well…as you can see I’m stressing over an assignment that should be fun. Hopefully before I have to bring in my rough notes on Friday, I will have come up with something. I might see if there’s any guidelines for my assignment before I make any notes. My professors are being extremely loose on the formats and guidelines as this is a creative writing course. They’re just awesome like that. They’re really…fantastic. I’m so happy I took this course.

— R.


Yes, that is the Pharaoh. Yes, his hair is pretty awesome. Yes, I do watch LittleKuriboh.

If someone actually styles their hair like this with the different colours and everything that would be really cool. Someone needs to do this. They would look like the coolest kid in all of…well the world. Okay I’m done. Got some writing to do…obviously. Can we just…admire his awesome hair. I always wanted cool hair like that but nope I got stuck with my plain generic black hair. Oh well…I’m thankful I have hair. Better not complain. I don’t wanna go grey early like my dad did. Ha….yah. I love you hair…but still…his hairs so cool.

I DID IT! :D *insert fire works*

So I completed that story I had to write for class this week. I read it yesterday and my class seemed to find it really funny, which was good.

Originally I was trying to be very serious with my story…and then I got extremely frustrated and kept scrapping every version of it I wrote. I rewrote it 4 times…yah….

Then Thursday came and I had nothing done. I was freaking out on my way to my first class this morning. Then I was late to class because I went to one building on campus and realized then that my class was in a building off campus. So I had to take the bus to my class, but my professor didn’t comment on my being late and I didn’t interrupt the discussion or anything…thank God.

So after class I went home and had lunch right? And then I went to my next class….

And then I came home and was like “Yah I’m gonna write this thing. I’ve got two hours before my next class.” I got to my apartment and I realized that I had lost my key. HOORAY! So I texted my roommates and rang on the doorbell just in case they were around. Both of them happened to be out and wouldn’t be back for several hours…yay!

I decided the best thing to do was to wander around until my next class and then try to find my key after the class was over. So my dad suggested I spend the two hours trying to write something for my class.

Maybe it was because I was extremely stressed out? I’m not really sure…but I managed to actually write something that I could smile about. I didn’t get to finish it before class but after class my roommate let me into the apartment and I worked on my story until it was finished. I met all the requirements that I was given and I was a happy camper…but I was extremely hungry from walking around all day because before I wrote my story I searched the entire campus for my key.

Anyway, I finished the story that was stressing my out! My class laughed pretty hard because at the end of the story my character was extremely hungry and decided to make a sandwich. Which is what I did when I finished writing it. Instead of doing a very serious story, I wrote a comedy to relieve my stress.

So yah! I might post the story a little later. At the moment I’m going to go look out my window because I hear loud music…and I’ve done nothing all day. I also need to make dinner for myself. But yah!

I DID IT! Sometimes when life knocks you down…it’s so you can do something totally great and unexpected.

— R.

WHY!?

So I got this writing assignment last week and I was given a sort of…topic like thing…anyway I’ve been sitting around trying to think of what to write for this. I have to read it out loud for 10 minutes. Earlier I got like…6 lines on paper? I have a bunch of notes on this topic at home and on my laptop but I don’t want to use them because it just seems wrong. I won’t need to put effort into it.

But then I come up with something new and then I think “Nope…this sucks.” and it’s so frustrating.

My mind feels like it’s going in circles. I’ve had a headache two nights in a row because the deadlines coming up and I’m seriously stuck. What am I going to do? I don’t want to be like “Hi…so…I tried to write it and well haha…funny…I thought it sucked so uh…yah. How about we pretend the assignment doesn’t exist!”

I wish it didn’t exist. I wish this was a “LET’S READ SOME RANDOM POETRY” or something assignment…. I just…I’m trying too hard.

Why is this happening to me!? This is the first assignment of the year and I have another one to start as soon as I finish this one and I think I ate too much….

Why? Why? Why? Why!?

WHY!? (Insert pity party music)

Excuse me I need to go hit my head off the wall again…I’ve basically done this all day….maybe it’s the main reason as to why I have a headache…..

Lots of Updates!

Tonight I’ll be seeing an author read a bit of his book. I’ve never been to one of these events before so I’m pretty excited. I’ll try to blog about it when I get home tonight but it really depends on how I’m feeling when I get home. I’ve been running around all day so I might just want to go to bed. Actually I currently want to go to bed, but because I need go out for the…what third time today? I guess I should just chill.

In other news, my classes have been excellent so far. Although I’ve only had about one of each class. It’s still been a lot of fun. I’m meeting new people, seeing familiar faces here and there. I’m going to make good memories this year. That’s my goal.

Writing wise I have a lot to do for school. I’m in a creative writing course so I’ll probably share some of the things I’ve written on here (once they’ve been marked and everything…since I use a pen name online). I realized when I moved into my apartment that I had left a chuck of my writing material at home and had only remembered to bring the two binders I had…. which kind of sucks but I’ll get them next time I’m home…or just scan them onto my computer somehow. Oh wait…I took the scanner. I can’t scan them. Well then…this will take some serious planning.

Overall my first week and a bit back at school has been excellent and I’m working to get out there and make memories. Also my apartment is really nice. I realized I’ve been here for almost three weeks…but it only feels like I’ve been here a week. I thought today was the 13th of September, but it turns out that it’s actually the 15th…according to my phone and laptop. This is why I need to put up my calendar. So I can keep track of things. At least I know what day of the week it is.

Hope everyone else is enjoy summers (probably short) comeback. I sure arm. The sun is nice. The sun is out friend. Don’t complain about the nice weather. Thank God it’s not snowing yet and when it snows, don’t complain because at least it’s not over 60 something degree’s (that’s 140 in farenheit…I Googled that for my American followers. I got you. 😛 ). Just embrace the weather…because whether or not you like it (haha see what I did there?), the weather is going to do what it wants. The weather is its own master. Unless you know…this is Sims and you used your Lifetime rewards to buy the weather changing machine.

Okay I’m going to stop talking now and eat cookies…and possibly spoil my dinner.

Enjoy your week!