Journel 11 – 2014

Speak to me with softness for your throat is tight. Look at me with kindness though you hate me inside. Pretend for me that this tension between us doesn’t exist. Smile with me, even if you are bitter.

For I don’t know that you are offended. I don’t see that I’ve done something wrong.

So for yourself please move along and act with glee. Your happiness is most important to yourself as well as to me.

 

To the Girl from the Elevator

You obviously don’t know this but I was feeling pretty down this morning.

I thought I was late to class and ran there only to find out that I was an hour early. I hadn’t finished the last two chapters in my reading for the week even though I’d stayed up late to try to finish them, even though I felt like throwing up. I ran out of laundry money but it was too cold to walk all the way to the other side of the school to get some in what I was wearing…since I had nothing else to wear. I lost something I needed and searched my entire desk for it but still couldn’t find it after making a mess of my room, which nearly made me late for my actual class. By the end of my last class, I was feeling horrible. I got back my first assignment and well, I didn’t do so great. I decided to buy myself a cupcake so that I could have myself a little pity party up in my room. I got to the place between the elevator and the stairs and started to think which would be better.

That’s when you showed up. “The struggle of deciding whether you should take the stairs or the elevator.” you said, and you laughed. “I do that all of the time.”

I forced a smile and said, “Yah.”

You asked me what floor I was on and after I replied you said, “That cupcake looks delicious.”

I told you where I’d gotten it from, in case you wanted one herself.

You said, “How’s your day been so far?”

“Pretty good.” I lied.

You complained about midterms coming up and said that you couldn’t wait until the weekend so that you could have some time to relax.

I nodded in agreement. I too was ready for a break.

Before you left the elevator you looked at me and said, “Well I hope you have a wonderful Thanks Giving!”

To tell you the truth, I was surprised. “Thank you….” I stood there a moment, then shouted to you before the doors shut, “You too!” After that as I went up to my floor, I found that I wasn’t feeling so down anymore. I was genuinely happy. I wondered if you were some “Cheer up Angel,” because the way I had suddenly gone from down to up was miraculous. I wish I’d asked what your name was so that I could say hello to you next time I see you…and because I’m shy about things like this I wanted to thank you. Even though it was a simple elevator conversation, it actually meant a lot to me.

So thanks,

— Orion Ryder